How to write your own wedding vows

Exchanging personal wedding vows to each other is a truly special moment in your big day. But how do you set about writing your own wedding vows?

This might seem like a daunting prospect among everything else that’s on your long to do list in the build up to your wedding, but following these simple steps will help guide you through writing wedding vows that work for you.

  • Agree at least an hour of uninterrupted time for the two of you and get comfy
  • Get Googling to see what already exists for some inspiration! There are plenty of suggestions out there and you can take ideas from different vows to create your own
  • With your recent Google finds in mind, think about the most important commitments that you want to make to each other for your future together. Don’t worry about the specific words for now just jot down ideas such as ‘to always be honest and open’ or ‘to make decisions together’ or ‘support each other to follow your dreams’
  • Next think about any individual words do you want to include in your vows? Maybe ‘sharing’ is important to you, ‘supporting’ each other or remaining ‘independent’
  • You can now start planning the structure for your vows. There are several ways you can start your vows such as:

I Joe take you Helen to be my lifelong partner and lover
Helen, I will always love and respect you

Then follow on with the commitments you have already agreed, in the form of promises such as:

I promise to support you and to help you follow your dreams
I will share my life with you, giving only the best of me to you

To finish off add a closing line such as:

I make these promises to you with all my heart
I promise to do this throughout our lives whatever our future may hold

  • Aim for 6 or 8 lines in total for your vows. Simple and sincere is the key
  • Once you have created your draft vows share these with your celebrant who can help you refine them if needed
  • Remember you don’t have to make the same promises to each other, choose what works best for you
Example wedding vows:

Helen, I will always love and respect you

I invite you to share my life as I hope to share yours

I promise to support you and help you to follow your dreams

I will try to bring you happiness and laughter

I will seek to achieve with you the life we have envisioned

Throughout our lives whatever our future may hold


Joe, you are my best friend and livelong partner

I promise to laugh with you, cry with you, and grow with you

I promise listen to you and to learn from you

I will love you when we are together and when we are apart

I will have faith in your love for me

Through all our years and all that life may bring us